There was a bit of an ‘incident’ a few days ago ahead of the (currently imminent) general election here in Ireland. The focal point was a dismissive response from a prominent politician to the views and needs of a care worker.
The response nationally is it’s own story, but one message rang loud and clear:
Carers need care too.
Hardly a revelation you might say. But at AUsome Training this is not just an observation of fact. It is a significant part of our ethos and the very work we do.
Many carers are either caring for dependent Neurodivergents, are themselves Neurodivergent, or both. Again, hardly news.
Everyone at AUsome Training is Neurodivergent, many – if not all – are multiply Neurodivergent. Our work is, in it’s own way, filling some gaps in the paltry support for exactly those carers whose needs and concerns were dismissed a week or so ago. We are part of the care-for-carers infrastructure. A lot of Autistic activists, trainers, therapists, etc. are.
This is us giving back, as best we can. Our Cothú courses are aimed directly at helping carers. Leanbh is designed to help professionals working alongside those carers. Dawn, very often, ends up changing the way professionals support adult Autistics who are themselves carers.
However… we, the people who create and deliver AUsome courses… we are also carers ourselves.
We’ve struggled. We still struggle. Our incomes, careers, education, physical and mental health, our relationships… these have all suffered. Because, despite the misconception that has in the past been deliberately used to divide ‘adult Autistic’ and ‘parent of Autistic’… we are very often both.
But, on top of that, it’s been worth it. It shouldn’t be so damn hard… but despite that it is always worth it.
That hurtful offhand dismissal a week ago stung because we were the kids relying on exactly those forgotten-about carers, we are those forgotten-about carers, and we – in so far as our resources allow – try to support those carers.
We get it. We’re more fortunate in many ways than a lot of others and we know that. But we do get it.
So, this is probably a good time for us to talk about solidarity.
Battles for recognition, rights, political action, social acceptance and more continue for both the Autistic community and the carer community that, in years past, did their best to make the future better for us and today do their best to make the future better for the wonderful Neurokinder who follow in our footsteps.
Last week’s ‘little incident’ was just a tiny fraction of what carers contend with day to day. It is mostly unseen. But we see it. We acknowledge it. Many of us bear the brunt of it as carers ourselves. We recognise it for the injustice it is. It is wrong and it is a shame on our society. Because this wasn’t just the actions of one politician. This was the norm laid bare.
A well-polished veneer of smooth words and spin was briefly lifted and a mass of rot was glimpsed by Ireland’s public at large. This was absolutely the right time to howl
“See that? SEE THAT? That’s the LEAST of what we endure day in, day out!”
The disgust expressed in response was appropriate and justified. The anger was appropriate and justified.
So yes. We see it. The Autistic Community in this country, and the wider Neurodivergent Community, see this injustice and we stand with carers in solidarity.
We share your disgust and your anger. And your determination for better.
But, if we stand alone, the battles will be endless. Together we really can change the world. As young Autistics we trusted you and relied on you for love, support, guidance and solidarity. So right now we offer you love, support, guidance and solidarity.
It won’t fix the mess. We don’t have solutions to everything. Far from it. Hell, we’re barely staying afloat ourselves most of the time. But what we can offer, we offer you now. We’re all of us in this together.
And together we will drag this country and it’s smooth-talking well-dressed ‘leaders’ into a brighter, kinder, more hopeful future.
Whether they like it or not.
